Sweet! A The Cheat!

Martin goes south to meet Bush

Heh heh.... "goes south"..... get it?.... heh heh.... meet "bush"....

Mr. Cherry said he hopes he and Mr. MacLean don't part ways. "Although I sometimes don't understand him, and I don't like his left-wing thinking and he's a referee . . . I still have fun with him doing Coach's Corner, and I can't imagine being on television without him, "Oh God, I've never said that before. He's going to think I'm going nuts."

See how your candidate rates on equal marriage rights

Went over to James' house last night to watch hockey and drink beer. What a spectacle!

OK, first, Montreal: What to say... They really were playing amazingly, and I can't believe they didn't score more. They deserved a win, but man, what a f***-up at the end. For those of you who didn't see it, there was bountiful swearing at James', as we are all Habs fans. We still have faith though, they can come back! And maybe they'll be a little more disciplined this time (5 players in the penalty box at once?).

Calgary: Woo hoo! Man, what a team! I have never seen a team work so hard. I don't mean to underplay their skill or talent or anything, but there is so much drive and determination in that team. Why couldn't Ottawa have found something like that? Calgary is going to go far, and I'm not just saying that because I'm a fan. I have many friends who have been converted to Flames fans watching these playoffs. I love players like Yzerman, but this team is just great.

And what a game! That kicked ass. Maybe not as fun as Game 2 with Vancouver, but pretty awesome. Who would have predicted Calgary leading Detroit 2-1? Me, that's who! I can only imagine how crazy Calgary (the city) is right now, I wish I was there. Hopefully I'll get to see some playoff action when I come back this summer. A final note: Sutter is a god (despite what some of you think) and he will get this team a cup.

Someone found my blog by searching for "god and pleased and kiprusoff" - well, I guess so...

"And the beer I had for breakfast wasn't bad, so I had one more for dessert. Then I fumbled in my closet through my clothes and found my cleanest dirty shirt."
-Johnny Cash

Happy International Student Loan Day!

And, I wear it for the thousands who have died,
Believin' that the Lord was on their side,
I wear it for another hundred thousand who have died,
Believin' that we all were on their side.
-Johnny Cash

Last chance!

Dalai Lama

So, I didn't go see the Dalai Lama in Ottawa because I couldn't afford tickets. Is it ironic to not be able to see a buddhist monk because you're too poor?

Hockey

Come on Flames! You can play better than that. Shoot, shoot, shoot! And once you have a few slashing penalties - stop hitting people with your stick, the refs will call it!

I take back what I said about the Conservatives. They should privatize this whole bureaucratic province.

Hey Americans, in case you have doubts: johnkerryisadouchebagbutimvotingforhimanyway.com

And don't forget to punk the vote

Another post to bait Ollie ;) Many Canadian conservatives are giddy over the newly merged Conservative Party. They believe the Canadian right was unjustly split between the Tories and the Reform/Alliance party. I, personally, believe there was as much difference between these two parties as there was between the Liberals and the Tories. I would probably never vote for the Reform/Alliance or the Conservatives, but I have voted, and would, vote Tory. I no longer have that option. The following is an excerpt from an article one of my Poli Sci profs wrote in 1997:

"If the Progressive Conservatives are foolish enough to think that Reform is but a mirror image, then they deserves to be wiped off Canada's political map. The philosophical differences between these two parties were profound, and it is a pity that the Progressive Conservatives are no longer aware of this.

The Progressive Conservative party has its origins in the British Tory tradition. Tories were old-style conservatives who did not buy into the liberal project of creating a society where inequality would be a result of talent and not birth. They regarded this ideal with skepticism and resigned themselves to the fact that there will always be inequality of opportunity that is a result of social class, wealth, and family background. Social inequalities are therefore a function of the accidents of birth and fortune, not merit.

For Tories, the idea that the social hierarchy is a reflection of natural inequalities is laughable precisely because all the talents and potentialities of nature are worthless in the absence of socially-acquired opportunities for their development. What nature provides is mere potentialities and not full-blown capacities. This is why the more privileged owe society a debt. This is the meaning of noblesse oblige. It is not a question of charity: it is a debt.

Although its origins date back to the 17th century, the Tory tradition was shaped by the work of British Prime Minister Benjamin Disraeli, who supported the Reform Bill of 1867 that gave working class males the vote, made trade unions legal and upheld the right of workers to strike. The British Tories forged an alliance between the aristocracy and the working classes that was meant to protect both from the rising capitalist middle classes. This conservatism with a heart was the dominant form of conservatism in England and Canada until Margaret Thatcher in 1979 allied conservatism with corporate interests, and Brian Mulroney followed suit here in 1984. This was the beginning of the demise of the Tory tradition in favor of the neoconservatism of the Reform party.

Neoconservatism is an American import that combines the worst of liberalism with the worst of conservatism. Far from endorsing the sobriety of the conservative view of social inequality, neoconservatism is a passionate exponent of liberal mythology. It pretends that liberal ideals have been actualized and that social inequalities are indeed a reflection of natural talents. The founding father of neoconservatism, Irving Kristol, is convinced that there is a nearly perfect correspondence between the bell curve of income and the bell curve of talent in America.

Bluntly put, neoconservatives assume that everyone who is rich must be clever and industrious, while everyone who is poor must be Lazy and stupid. The unfortunate have only themselves to blame, and the fortunate, having acquired their fortunes by their own efforts owe nothing to the society that made their achievements possible. The wedding of liberal mythology and neoconservative pretensions fuels the discontent at the heart of liberal society. Neoconservatism rejects all liberal efforts to make equality of opportunity a reality, because it is convinced that it already is. This explains its hostility towards the social welfare state and its alliance with corporate Capitalism.

The neoconservative philosophy becomes particularly pernicious when it allies itself with sociobiology as a means of explaining social inequalities. But this deadly fascination with biology will not buy votes in a multiracial country like Canada, and it is judiciously softened by the Reform party with an emphasis on charity as the virtue that will flower once the social welfare estate is dismantled. Friedrich Hayek, the neoclassical economist and guru of neoconservatives in Canada and the United States, is the architect of this idea.

However, it seems to me that understanding the relationship between the privileged and the underprivileged in terms of charity misses the mark. It assumes that the talents with which we are endowed by nature are more than mere potentialities that must be cultivated in a social setting in which not everyone will have equal opportunities. We need to be reminded by Tories that the relation between the haves and the have-nots is not a question of charity, but a matter of justice; that what is owed to the poor is not a gift but a debt. But alas, the days of Joe Clark and Robert Stanfield are long gone."

-Shadia Drury, excerpt from "Demise of the Tory Tradition," Calgary Herald May 17, 1997, p. J5

"To impose freedom on others is to opress them; to force equality on them is to treat them as inferior; to spread democracy through the barrel of a gun is to undermine it. The means destroy the ends."
-Tzvetan Todorov

Looking for a job?

Member Relations Officer

Wow, that hockey game sucked. Stupid Sens. Oh well, 2 out of 3 ain't bad.

UK and U.S. Submariners to Play North Pole Soccer

Hey fuckers, go play soccer in your own territory. Or even better, fix the mess you made in Iraq.

As a government relations professional in Ottawa I get many questions about why the Martin government is having such a rough time. I was going to do a post about it, but I think this article sums it up quite well:

Grit MPs want PM's 'thugs' out

Note to Paul: Pssst! You won the leadership contest. Time to be Prime Minister!

HAPPY BSD!

HAPPY BSD Calgarians!

How sad, I'm missing my second BSD in a row. Please, have a drink for me. Or ten.

Here we go. Boo-yah.

Tearful MP puts career on hold after pocketing jewelry

I am officialy copyrighting the "Free Svend" T-Shirts.

(image stolen from my brother)

Ok, let's see. Where to sart... Good news first I guess.

Calgary Flames: That was a hockey game. That's how you play hockey, boys. That's how teams win hockey games and how they win the cup. You don't slack off because you're up a point. You haul ass until the game's over. What a great game. So excited to see Kiprusoff get a playoff shutout. Now let's extend it! Darryl Sutter, you are such a great coach. This team and the city owe a lot to you. Woo!

Now, on to the bad. Montreal: wtf? That is how you don't play a hockey game. Oh look at us, we're winning by a point, let's waste a 2-man advantage! Empty net? Why score when we can ice-the-fucking-puck!? Oh look, a faceoff in our end and it goes to O.T. Oh no, I've been slashed, I better give up the puck, not look where I'm going, bump into my own player and cost my team the fucking game! Argh!

Montreal, go watch the tape from the Flames game. Notice how they worked the Canucks for the whole game, didn't give up when they even had a 3-0 lead, and still managed to get the empty-netter? That's hockey.

Canada shouldn't flirt with separatist Dalai Lama: Chinese embassy

Chinese embassy should kiss my cold Canadian ass: Toby

Ok, a poll of sorts: It's been over a year (I think). Who thinks I need a new Blog Template?

Martin to meet with Dalai Lama despite protests from trade partner

Mr Martin, you may get my vote after all.

On a dog-related note, I have determined this is what is wrong with the world. There are human beings who could do this to an otherwise noble dog:



There are special, extra hot parts of hell reserved for people who buy these types of things.

So my brother's dog has a webpage. I don't even have a dog and he has a dog with a webpage. I forwarded this to my coworkers with unintended consequences. Kim is now falling in love with random Newfoundland dogs from the internet.

Last night's Flames gae was one of the best games I've seen in a long, long time. The Flames played awesomely. Mad props to the Canucks' goalie for keeping the score so low. This is gonna be a great series!

Normally I hate forwards, so I won't forward this. But a recent grad sent this to me so I could wax nostalgic about university life. And here are the commandments of university:

I- Thou Shalt Nap
And God gave unto Student a great gift, the gift of
napping. God said to him, You shall spend half your day
napping. You shall nap in class, in your room and in your
friend's room. And God said, if you don't nap, you will
not be able to stay up all night drinking. And Student
said, Nap I shall, and it was good.

II- Thou Shalt Get Sick All the Time
Now God said to Student, you must be sick all of the time.
And student said why. And God said unto him, you shall
share drinks, stay up too late, drink too much and make
out with people you don't know. Therefore, God said, you
shall be sick all year round. But God said, blessed are
the sick for they have partied the hardest. And it was
good.

III- Thou Shalt Write Witty Away Messages
Student asked, but God, how will I show everyone that I am
funny? And God said unto him, thou shall write witty away
messages. God said to student, you shall never just say
you are in the shower, you shall say you are getting wet
and wild.in the shower. You shall never say you are at
class, you shall say you are sleeping.in class. God said,
if you do not write witty away messages, I shall smite
you. Blessed are the funny, for they will get many girls
to be their friends but never hook up with them. And it
was good.

IV- Thou Shalt Wear a Hoodie
And then Student asked God, God how do I look like a
college kid. And God said unto student, you must wear a
hoodie, for it is a useful garment. And you shall never
wash it either. Student asked God what kind of Hoodie
should it be and God said, you shall own one with your
school's logo on it and you shall own many others of
varying colors and creeds. And Student was pleased and God
was pleased.

V- Thou Shalt Shit a Lot
And Student asked of his bathroom habit and God told him,
Student, you shall eat in the Cafeteria and you shall shit
a lot. And it will not be good shit, it will be the shit
of the devil for your ass shall burn for hours. Your
school shall put laxatives in their food and you shall
feel their pain. And Student began to weep, and God said
unto him, Student, fear not the shit, for all your fellow
students will be experiencing the same. And Student dried
his eyes and thanked God and God told him to use wet naps
to ease the pain.

VI- Thou Shalt Eat EasyMac
Student asked unto God if there was any alternatives to
the cafeteria, and God said to him, you shall eat a lot of
EasyMac. It is easy to make and you don't need milk or a
stove. And student said microwaves were forbidden by the
RA. And God said to him, you shall hide the microwave
under your bed with a towel on top. And Student asked,
what if it is discovered. And God told him to stop being
such a pussy, and it was good.

VII- Thou Shalt Hook Up
Student then asked of sex. And God said, Student, you
shall hook up and be happy. You shall go home with random
people every weekend and forget about them the next day.
You shall see them at class and be awkward amongst their
company. You shall exchange saliva at bars and parties and
it will be good. And Student became gleeful and God told
Student to wrap it up because He knows where she has been,
but Student does not.

VIII- Thou Shalt Join a Club and Never Go to Meetings
Student inquired of his spare time and God reminded him
that he should be napping. But Student said he wanted to
do other things. So God said unto him, you shall join a
club at the beginning of the semester, but then never go
to meetings. And Student asked why he should not go to
meetings, and God told him, because the glee club is gay.
And Student understood His wisdom.

IX- Thou Shalt Wake Up Confused
God said to Student, there will come many a day when you
shall wake up in the bed of another and not know where you
are. You will not remember what you did last night and you
shall be confused. You will see that you have nipple rings
and a tattoo now and are covered in Sharpie. And Student
was disturbed by this, but God said, you shall tell great
stories about it to your friends someday. And Student
understood and God took a sip of a beer.

And God gave Student the final Commandment

X- Thou Shalt Gain Weight
And Student wished to hear the final commandment and God
said he would not like it. But Student insisted, so God
said unto him, you shall gain weight. However, God said,
you will not buy new clothes, so you will wear sweat pants
a lot. God said, Student, you will watch a lot of TV and
become fat to which Student wept profusely. But God
comforted Student saying, you will still get ass even if
you cannot tie your shoes anymore. Student felt better and
God pointed to Student's chest saying, those will soon be
bitch tits. And it was good.

Math music doesn't count

Our 'separatists' were just flirting, Martin says: PM ** defends eight who are running for Liberals in federal election

Oh, well as long as they were just "flirting" with the idea of destroying the country. Dumbass.

Sweet!

Law makers should not be law breakers

Oh yeah.

How will my teams do? Oh, so exciting.

-11? Brrrrrrrr, what the juice?

So it's 12:36pm and I just got to work. I'm not huungover or anything, I just slept in (I assume due to my cold). The laws of the universe seem to dictate that no matter how late I am to work, I'm never the last one here. Today is no exception. Still 2 to come. I think I'm employee of the month.

Sweet!